Want To Learn How To Orgasm With A Partner?
A few days ago, I mentioned that I let my readers choose the topic of my next program. The most popular program idea was…
Learn how to orgasm with a partner!
You may already know that I have a course that teaches women how to orgasm – Finishing School. Finishing School is geared towards women who have never had an orgasm, period. It does cover how to orgasm with a partner, but the focus is on learning how to orgasm on your own first.
In reading all of the personal stories that accompanied the votes, I realized I had really underestimated how many of you ladies already know how to orgasm on your own, but don’t know how to get there with a partner. Finishing School isn’t really the right program for you, because you don’t need to learn how to orgasm on your own.
It’s kind of silly that I was surprised by all of these stories, since I myself have been in that exact position.
Personal confession time – I figured out how to orgasm on my own relatively easily. I spent time exploring my body and learning what I liked best, and eventually figured out how to make myself orgasm.
But once I started having sex with partners, I realized that it was hard for me to translate what I knew about making myself orgasm to having an orgasm with a partner. It felt like an entirely new ballgame, because it was!
Orgasming by yourself is a different experience from orgasming with a partner.
I had absolutely no idea what would work now that there was another person there with me. I didn’t know what I needed or wanted my partner to do. I felt too shy to explain what worked for me on my own. And I certainly didn’t feel confident enough to touch myself in front of another person.
So I did what so many women do – I started faking orgasms.
It seemed like a good option at the time. I didn’t want to hurt my partner’s feelings. I wanted it to seem like things were “clicking” between us, like we had good sexual chemistry. I didn’t want sex to feel like “work”. And I didn’t want to feel like something was wrong with me for not being able to orgasm naturally and effortlessly.
This continued for years, even as I went on to study human sexuality. There I was, working towards a career as a sex therapist, learning about how female orgasm works, and still struggling to apply those lessons to my own life.
Every time I faked an orgasm, I felt like such a fraud. I felt like I was betraying myself. Damaging my relationship with my sexuality. Losing my connection to myself.
I got so good at faking that I could even fool myself into thinking I’d had an orgasm. I would believe it for a few seconds, and then the flood of guilt and shame would come rushing in, stronger and stronger every time.
So believe me, ladies, I know all about the frustrations of not being able to orgasm with a partner.
Even typing this now, I can still feel traces of all of that shame, embarrassment, and heartbreak.
Finally, I reached a breaking point. I was in between relationships at the time, and I promised myself I would never fake an orgasm ever again. When I got into my next relationship, I was determined to learn how to orgasm with my partner.
And you know what? I did learn! It took time, patience, and communication, but I learned.
In some senses, it was an even more empowering experience than learning how to orgasm on my own. I was older, more mature, and had this history of not being true to myself. Being able to turn all of that around felt like an incredible triumph.
And that’s not to mention the fact that the orgasms themselves are amazing!
So yeah, duh, how did I not realize that there would be so many ladies out there who can take care of themselves just fine on their own, but want to learn how to orgasm with a partner for the first time?!
Now, it’s time for you to get to have the same transformational experience that I did.
I’ve created a special edition of Finishing School called Finishing School: Orgasm With A Partner. You’ve already figured out how to orgasm on your own, and you may even be extremely satisfied with your solo sex life. But you just can’t get there when there’s another person in your bed. Finishing School: Orgasm With A Partner is suitable for women of all sexual orientations and relationship statuses (in other words, you don’t need to be in a serious relationship to participate).
[To be perfectly clear – this is not the program to take if you’ve never had an orgasm. You will not learn how to have your first orgasm in this edition, so please take a look at the original version of Finishing School.]
You can head over to the Finishing School: Orgasm With A Partner homepage for all the details, but here’s a little taste of what you’ll learn:
The single most effective way of orgasming with a partner, practically guaranteed to get you there every time.
Techniques for orgasming from manual stimulation, oral sex, toys, and intercourse (including the best sex positions).
The most up-to-date research on how female orgasm works, and how to prevent orgasmic myths and personal blockages from sabotaging your ability to orgasm.
How to allow yourself to take up time and attention when you’re with a partner.
Strategies for eliminating distractions in the moment (no more worrying about your to-do list as your partner is between your legs!).
How to feel more comfortable talking to your partner about your needs and desires – and how to give yourself permission to even have those needs and desires in the first place.
All of the workshops are online, so you can listen from the privacy and comfort of your own home, and the convenience of your own schedule.
Finishing School: Orgasm With A Partner also comes with a few amazing bonuses:
1 Minna Life Limon, a luxury vibrator ($120 value)
1 bottle of Pjur premium lubricant ($30 value)
Unlimited personalized email coaching, until you’ve had your first orgasm with a partner ($115 value each)
I’m experimenting with a new scheduling system for my online programs, so registration for Finishing School: Orgasm With A Partner is only going to be open until Thursday, November 17th at 11:59 Pacific Time. The doors will close on the 18th. They may open again at some point in the future, but I have no specific plans at the moment, and there are no guarantees!
If you want to learn how to orgasm with a partner, now’s the time.
Above, I said that learning how to orgasm on your own is different from learning how to orgasm with a partner. It can feel frustrating in the moment (it sure was for me), but once you learn how to orgasm with a partner, you understand why.
It’s because orgasms with a partner feel different from orgasms that you have on your own.
Don’t get me wrong – I’ll never stop having and enjoying orgasms on my own. But orgasming with a partner requires so much vulnerability, trust, and intimacy, all of which only serve to heighten the intensity of the orgasm itself. It can be more work, yes, but the payoff is much higher too.
Orgasming with another person can be life-changing.
You’ll have these moments when you’ll be rendered completely speechless by the intensity of what you just experienced. Moments when you’ll get serious cases of the giggles together. Moments when you’ll be awestruck by the amount of pleasure your body is capable of feeling. Moments when you’ll be so freaking thankful to yourself for giving yourself this gift.
Ready for those moments? Come on over.