Reader’s Request Friday: Rumination

This week’s question comes from Darren*. He writes, “I find it difficult to turn off my brain a lot of the time. I can feel thoughts racing around in my head and I feel powerless against turning them off.”

Thanks for your question Darren. Most people have had the experience of their thoughts running amok in their heads. It’s an unpleasant experience, and it’s only made worse when it happens frequently. Being constantly in your head prevents you from being in the moment or in your body, can bring on feelings of stress or anxiety, can leave you feeling stuck and helpless, and can also feel like a big waste of time.

That being said, there are usually good reasons why so many of us develop this frustrating problem. You may have learned from past experience that being in your head is the only “safe” place to be. You may be dealing with a harsh inner critic. You may have felt so overwhelmed by life’s challenges or stresses that you became convinced you could get back in control just by thinking of the exact right solution. You may have experienced a trauma that some part of you is still trying to sort out or make sense of. You may have made a decision or a mistake that you are beating yourself up over. Therapy offers a vehicle for you to explore your history with rumination and uncover possible hidden meanings behind the behavior.

You may also want to consider any of the following options to help you deal with rumination when you notice yourself start to get sucked into that familiar vortex of thought:

• Schedule a time to ruminate. Allow yourself 30 minutes every day to think about the particular issue or problem you keep butting up against. If you notice yourself thinking about it outside of your scheduled 30 minutes, try to gently remind yourself that you have set aside time to ruminate later. This seemingly simple exercise can be quite powerful when put into practice.
• Keep a pad of paper with you at all times, and write down the thoughts whenever you have them. You can also use an app on your smartphone. Rumination frequently occurs because we are afraid of forgetting our thoughts. If you can assure yourself that you won’t forget it by creating tangible proof, you may notice some of the thoughts subsiding.
• Visualize your thoughts gently drifting away. Come up with imagery that feels soothing and relaxing to you. You may want to visualize putting your thoughts on top of a fluffy cloud and watching the cloud float away. Or the thoughts might be dust particles that get blown away in a gust of wind.
• Do something physical. Push your body to its limits to force some of your attention out of your head and into your body. Try lifting very heavy weights, sprinting as hard as possible, or doing as many pushups as you can.
• Try some breathing exercises. Get in a comfortable place and close your eyes. Count to 10 during your inhalations and exhalations, holding your breath for a moment at the top of your inhalation. Visualize sending your breath to different parts of your body. Listen to a guided breathing meditation. Breathing is one of the easiest and most effective ways to bring relief to almost any problem.
• Ruminate while lying down. Studies have shown that we can be more creative and think about our problems in a different light when we are on our backs, looking up.
• Try to get curious about your ruminations. Why do you think you’re thinking about this particular issue? Which part of you is so concerned about this problem? How long have you been having these kinds of thoughts? What are the exact feelings that come up when you ruminate? What do you need when you get into this stuck place?